Hi, I'm Nicholas, and I'm a recovered "self-help junkie!"
For much of my life, I struggled with depression, anxiety, abuse, bullying, & crippling performance anxiety - which for an aspiring opera singer was a real problem!
I thought feeling stress and anxiety meant I was broken; that something was wrong with me. I figured I wasn’t born with the qualities I saw in others, like confidence, resilience, and happiness. Or maybe it was up to me to get them.
So I became a self-professed “self-help junkie”. I devoured books, attended seminars, took courses, and soaked up every technique I could find to feel better about myself. I did therapy, positive thinking, affirmations, CBT, mindfulness, – you name it. Along the way, I earned certifications in Life Coaching, NLP, Laughter Yoga, and personality typology, and I became a successful Board Certified Hypnotist with a thriving, international practice and regular invitations to speak at the major hypnotherapy conferences in the US.
Along the way, my opera goals came to fruition. I was accepted into the elite opera training program at The Juilliard School. I won many of the major opera competitions in the US. My career expanded to include leading roles at prestigious companies throughout the US, the UK, and Germany. And in what still feels surreal to me, I was invited to make my debut at the Mt. Everest of the opera world – the Metropolitan Opera.
But while on the outside, I was helping clients and enjoying a successful performing career, I still felt screwed up inside. I constantly worried what others thought of me. I hustled for approval and validation. I braced for the moment when people would finally see me for the fraud I believed I was. I never let others see me struggle because I was supposed to the example of “having your s%@t together”. And I beat myself up big time for it, thinking, “I should know better. This isn’t supposed to happen to me.”
And then, one day I stumbled upon a revolutionary new paradigm of mental health and performance psychology that turned my world upside down. I saw that all the things I had been chasing for years – confidence, resilience, peace of mind, and happiness – were not only already there all along, they were my default, factory setting. I saw that I have endless access to fresh wisdom, inspiration, and creativity. I realized that so many of the things I had seen as “problems” were actually normal parts of being human.
And the biggest life-changer?
I saw there’s nothing I need to do to be OK because I am already OK.
My wellbeing is innate. It never comes from anything outside of me, and it’s nothing I have to cultivate myself. (And PS – the same is true for you).
Seeing this changed everything for me. I stopped trying to fix things on the outside and started listening more to what felt right and made sense on the inside. I dropped all my old techniques and interventions in my work. And instead of trying to fix my clients, I started to help them wake up to the truth that they were never broken and reconnect with the wellbeing they've always had within.
I’ve done practically no "self-work" since I saw these simple truths for myself. And yet, I’ve never been happier, enjoyed life, and felt more gloriously alive than I do right now.
I help people fall in love with their own humanity.
Have I become an Enlightened Super Human™? No way! I’m just as ordinary as I was before. I still feel anxious, insecure, and low from time to time. I overthink more than I’d like to admit. But none of that scares me anymore. It no longer feels like some flaw I need to fix, and it doesn’t stop me from getting things done and living the life I want.
Now, I get a front row seat to watching others come alive. Coaching is so much fun that I decided to step away from my performing career to serve others full time. To this day, the light in someone’s eyes when they first glimpse their own innate OK-ness beats any standing ovation I ever received as a performer.
Enough about me!
How can I support you?
The Official Bio
Nicholas Pallesen is a Transformative Coach, Mental Performance Consultant, and Speaker. For over a decade, he has helped people from all walks of life reconnect with their innate potential and bring that potential into the world.
Nicholas has garnered respect within the performing arts community as the "Coach for the Soul", helping artists thrive both on the biggest performance stages and in their everyday lives offstage. A former opera singer himself, Nicholas performed at the Metropolitan Opera, the English National Opera, and many other companies throughout the US and Europe. He is a graduate of the renowned Juilliard School and winner of many of the most prestigious opera competitions in the US.
As a coach, Nicholas is honored to work with an international spectrum of clients from high school students to Hollywood and TV actors, Broadway performers, and artists at the top orchestral and opera institutions in the world. He is regularly invited to speak and mentor artists at conservatories and training programs in the US and UK. He currently serves as a faculty member for the New World Symphony and the Wolf Trap Opera Company.
Though many of his clients come from the performing arts, Nicholas enjoys helping teachers, nurses, lawyers, athletes, executives, writers, therapists, and others fall more deeply in love with their life and bring their full potential into the world with much less struggle and effort.